The Godly Knight Report
The Godly Knight Report is a faith-driven podcast hosted by Michael the Archangel, dedicated to exploring the intersection of Christian values and modern life. Each episode delves into practical, biblical insights on relationships, dating, marriage, and personal growth, always rooted in a God-centered worldview. Michael speaks with authenticity, drawing from personal experience and scripture to address real-life challenges, such as navigating hookup culture, maintaining purity, and building meaningful, God-centered connections in today’s society. The podcast fosters a welcoming space for listeners to reflect on their spiritual journey, offering not just biblical exegesis but practical advice for living a life that honors God. With a focus on faith, personal transformation, and building stronger relationships, The Godly Knight Report challenges cultural norms while encouraging listeners to remain true to biblical teachings.
The Godly Knight Report
Building Meaningful, God-Centered Relationships in a Modern World: Navigating Conflict With Grace
What if the key to resolving conflict lies not in being heard, but in embracing humility and the power of gentle words? Join me, Michael the Archangel, as we explore these profound biblical principles in our latest episode on navigating conflict with grace and purpose. Drawing from personal experiences and scripture, like Ephesians 4:29 and James 4:1-2, we unravel how our own unmet desires and pride often ignite quarrels. Together, we’ll reflect on the significance of prioritizing peace over personal victory and how our words can either uplift or harm those around us.
Discover actionable steps toward peaceful conflict resolution, emphasizing the vital role of peacemaking. We’ll delve into the importance of prayer for clarity and patience as guided by Philippians 4:6-7 and explore communication strategies that prevent defensiveness, such as using "I" statements and practicing active listening. Proverbs 15:1 reminds us of the transformative power of a gentle response, while Matthew 7:5 encourages introspection and humility. Whether you're seeking reconciliation or simply wish to strengthen your relationships, this episode offers timeless wisdom to foster understanding and unity, grounded in scripture.
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Hello everyone and welcome back to the Godly Knight Report. I'm your host, michael the Archangel, and I'm so glad you're joining me today as we continue with our relationship series. An inevitable part of life, whether it's a co-worker, a family member, a friend or even within our church community. You know disagreements will arise. The question is not whether we'll face conflict, but how we'll respond to it. Now I want to start today's episode with a question.
Speaker 1:When you've been in a disagreement, have you ever walked away feeling like you could have handled it better? I know there have been times that I've felt that way. Conflict can bring out the worst in us if we let it, but God's word provides us with a better way, a way that brings healing and not harm. Today, we're going to explore what it means to navigate conflict with grace rooted in biblical principles that honor God and uplift others. Let's begin this important conversation with a word of prayer. Let's begin this important conversation with a word of prayer. Heavenly Father, thank you for being the God of peace and reconciliation. As we navigate the topic of conflict, we ask for your wisdom and guidance to approach our disagreements in ways that reflect your love and truth. Help us to see others through your eyes and to honor you in every word, deed and action In Jesus's name. Amen, amen. So for me, there is one scripture that I feel sets the precedent for how we, as believers in Christ, should handle conflict, and I feel it's a great example to follow in general, that scripture being Ephesians, chapter four, verse twenty nine, which reads Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up as fits the occasion that it may give grace to those who hear.
Speaker 1:Here in the scripture, the word corrupting refers to something that is harmful or unwholesome. Paul is urging us to not speak in ways that damage or hurt others. This includes gossip, insults or any words that tear people down. Essentially, our speech should be pure and not contribute to negativity or harm. Instead, each instead of harmful speech, we are to speak words that are helpful, words that encourage and strengthen others. This means speaking with kindness and purpose, considering what the other person needs to hear at that moment. It's about being aware of how our words and actions affect others and using our speech to lift them up.
Speaker 1:Paul emphasizes that our words should benefit others. They should serve to encourage, guide and bless those who hear them, making a positive impact in their lives. So, in simple terms, what Paul is telling us is to be mindful of our words. We should avoid speaking negatively or in ways that harm others. Instead, we should speak words that encourage, build up and help others, keeping in mind their needs. Our speech should be a tool for good, benefiting those who hear it.
Speaker 1:Now, if you don't get anything else out of this scripture, please remember this. Keep this, this scripture. Please remember this. Keep this in mind. Etch this on your heart. Our words are powerful. They can either hurt or help. As followers of Christ, we are called to use our words to build others up, not tear them down. To build others up, not tear them down.
Speaker 1:Now, I know from personal experience and we're human beings, we're not God, we're not perfect In the midst of a conflict, you may feel that desire to get your point across, to let the other person know that they're hurting you, that your feelings are just as important as theirs, and a lot of times it's a struggle. It's a battle to be heard, and I can admit that there have been times when I've I've been in conflict with people and I don't always listen with the intention of trying to find ways to make that person feel better. If I'm being completely honest here, a lot of times I've listened to build my case, to prepare my defense, to get my weapons sharpened so that when my turn comes then I can inflict more damage and I can make that person feel what I'm feeling or get my point across. And as Christians, dear brothers and sisters, that is the opposite of what we're supposed to do. And it's not always easy, because in that moment you've got emotions flowing and logic might have gone out the window, and in that moment you may be giving into the desires of your flesh, which is to defend yourself, which is to make yourself heard, which is to you know, have your feelings and your emotions respected. In that moment it's. It's not a it's not an easy thing to do. It's a difficult thing to do. It really is. It can be difficult, but it is possible. It really is. It can be difficult, but it is possible.
Speaker 1:So let's try to understand the root of conflict in the first place, because, let's be honest, conflict doesn't appear out of thin air, you know. It has roots that often go deeper than we realize. In James, chapter four, verses one through two, 2, it's put rather plainly what causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this that your passions are at war within you? You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel. So, at its core, conflict often arises from our own desires, whether that's our need to be right, to feel valued or to get what we want. These unmet expectations, they can create tension even with those we love the most. Pride and selfishness also play. They can create tension even with those we love the most. Pride and selfishness also play a huge role in fueling disagreements.
Speaker 1:Think about a time when you insisted on having the last word or you refused to admit you were wrong. I think we've all been there at some point. These are moments when our own desires take precedence over unity and peace. Those are the moments that I was just talking about, when your emotions are just like so high and you've pretty much turned yourself over to your emotions, and your pride steps in, humility goes out the door and you become somewhat selfish because you're thinking about yourself. In that moment, you're not thinking about the other person. The God calls us to a different standard. He asks us to examine our hearts and motivations, to recognize when pride is driving us, and it's in that moment that we're supposed to seek humility instead. And, like I said, I'm not going to sit here and lie to you.
Speaker 1:It's not an easy thing to do. It's hard to shut down your emotions in that moment. It takes a strong person. The only way to get that strength, though, is to ask God for that strength. Ask God to help you to become better with self-control, to better rein in your emotions, to give you wisdom in that moment, to know what to say and what not to say. It's not an easy thing, believe me. So, in that moment, we are supposed to take on the role of a peacemaker, and a lot of people get this wrong. They think that being a peacemaker is about sweeping things under the rug or avoiding confrontation, and that's not it at all. It's the opposite. It's about addressing issues in a way that leads to resolution and growth.
Speaker 1:Jesus himself said in Matthew, chapter 5, verse 9, blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. Peacemaking requires intentionality and courage. It means seeking reconciliation even when it's not comfortable. Yeah, I want you to sit on that, stew on that for just a minute. Being a peacemaker, you have to do it on purpose. You have to do it when it doesn't feel good. You have to do it when everything in your body is screaming. You know let's go to war. You know we got to take this person out. You know we got to knock them off their pedestal. They don't know what they're talking about. They disrespected me. You know I got to make them see. No, you got to drop all that. You got to brush all that aside. And it's hard because we're humans, we're not perfect beings, but that doesn't mean that we can't do it Now.
Speaker 1:The Bible gives several examples of peacemakers, but I'm going to give you three, three that I think are really great. First you have Joseph. Joseph forgave his brothers, choosing reconciliation over revenge, despite the pain they caused him. And then you have Paul. Paul resolved disputes within the early church. He urged believers to maintain unity in Christ. And then the ultimate example Jesus himself. Example, jesus himself, because he bridged that great divide between us and God when he sacrificed himself on the cross. That was a conflict between us and God, and he resolved that conflict by sacrificing himself. Did it feel good to him? No, he prayed and he asked his father to take that away from him, but at the same time, he wanted to do the will of his father.
Speaker 1:And remember what I said being a peacemaker, you have to be intentional. You have to do it even when you might be afraid or angry or or just at war. You have to do it when it doesn't feel right, when it doesn't feel good. Peacemaking, you know, it's not a passive thing, it's active, it's a choice, it's an intentional choice and it's a reflection of God's heart. So let's break this down into some actionable steps for how to resolve conflict. These are some steps that I think work well. So these are some steps that I think I think work well, and I think that there's steps that we can all do with practice.
Speaker 1:You know it's, trust me, every time you get into a conflict, you're not going to say to yourself OK, by the book, they are not, you know, like turn-based video games where you know one person gets a turn and then, when it's your turn, they don't attack you while you're taking your turn. No, it doesn't work that way. No, it's not a turn-based incident. You have to be able to act in the moment. You have to be able to choose the godly path. You have to be able to choose the path of a peacemaker In the moment.
Speaker 1:So Probably the biggest step that you could take in a conflict is to pray first. Before addressing any conflict, take it to God in prayer. Philippians, chapter 4, verses 6 through 7. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your request to God, and the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Prayer helps us approach the situation with clarity, with patience and with the heart aligned with God's will. Because, believe me, to be a peacemaker you need those. You need to be clear of mind, you have to be patient in the moment and you have to be aligned with God's will. There is no other way.
Speaker 1:The next step I would recommend would be to approach with humility. You definitely don't want to approach the situation being haughty and proud and selfish. You don't want that. Proverbs, chapter 15, verse 1, teaches us that a soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. You go to a person in the middle of a conflict and say something nasty and watch and see what happens. Do you think the door for resolution is going to open? No, it's going to open. No, it's going to slam shut in your face and probably break your nose. But all jokes aside, humility opens the door for resolution. It opens the door for reconciliation, and you have to acknowledge your own faults. Jesus instructs us in Matthew, chapter 7, verse 5 First take the plank out of your own eye and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.
Speaker 1:You can't possibly begin to criticize or reprimand or accuse someone when you yourself are guilty. You can't possibly do that. Communicate effectively. So, when you're in the midst of a conflict, choose your words wisely. Instead of blaming with you statements, try using I statements to express your feelings without escalating the situation. So, for example, instead of saying you never listen to me, try saying I feel unheard when we don't take time to discuss things calmly. Now, I know that's going to take some practice, trust me.
Speaker 1:Like I said, in the middle of a heated conflict, your natural tendency is to sit and say you know what the other person's doing wrong. Or you always want to say you, you, you, you, you, because in your mind, it is that person that is causing the issue, true. However, if you try to start your words with I instead of saying you, what happens is that person stops feeling personally attacked. That person stops feeling like, okay, they're blaming it on me. And when you say, I feel what you're doing is you're, you're taking it back to yourself and you're taking the pressure off the other person and you're getting them to hear you rather than hearing. Oh, so it's my fault, it's always my fault, it's always my fault. And that's what's going through that person's head. Anytime you say you never this or you do this, you do that.
Speaker 1:The other person is sitting there saying to themselves oh great, something else I did. It's always me, me, me, me. But then, when you take it to a I feel or I think, that other person is like OK, so this is what they're feeling, this is what they're thinking, so this is what they're feeling, this is what they're thinking. Okay, all right, am I, am I doing, you know, something to make them feel this way? You know, am I really doing this? And it might give them time to actually stop and think about it and say, hey, you know, maybe, maybe I am. You know, maybe I'm not listening, or maybe I'm not hearing what they're saying. You know, and it's called active listening. Um, active listening is extremely important. Um, it's.
Speaker 1:It's best to to make a conscious effort to hear the other person. And when you do that, you want to hear the other person without preparing your defense or your next attack or your rebuttal while they're speaking or your rebuttal while they're speaking. You want to listen to them and hear what it is that they're actually trying to say. You want to listen, to understand, not to defend. And again, I know that's hard because in life in general, when you're being accused, when you're being attacked, the first thing you want to do is defend yourself. The first thing you want to do is mount your defense. And so you're not listening at the time to find a way to get in and fix it. You're listening at the time to find a way to take a jab, and you know take a stab, and you know get back at them or you know, deflect a blow. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:So it takes. It takes somebody with courage. It takes a person with you know, humility, a person with a good heart, to be able to to weather that storm. Because that's exactly what it is. It's a storm. You're in the middle of a storm at the moment and everything is just coming at you at once, but you have to be able to stand there, even when it feels uncomfortable. You have to be able to stand and keep your mind clear.
Speaker 1:Focus on reconciliation, which brings me to my next step. Seek reconciliation, not revenge, and again, I know that's difficult. Romans, chapter 12, verses 19 through 21, calls us to leave vengeance to God. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. And the thing is no one, no one, can get revenge the way God can. He is the master of revenge. You leave that to him. All you need to do is focus on resolving the issue, any payback that needs to happen. He is the master, he will make it happen and he can do way more than you or I could ever imagine.
Speaker 1:Forgiveness, and this is probably the most essential ever imagine Forgiveness, and this is probably the most essential thing in seeking reconciliation. This is what you want. This is what you must possess. You must possess a heart that forgives. In Colossians 3, verse 13, bear with each other and forgive one another. If any of you has a grievance against someone, forgive, as the Lord forgave you, and keep in mind that forgiveness is not for the other person, it's for you. It is definitely for you. Forgiveness sets you free. It's the most freeing thing you can do in a conflict is to forgive, put it down, let it go. You can't expect granted because you did not know mercy.
Speaker 1:Now there are situations where you know resolution is impossible. I mean human beings. You know pride and selfishness and they get in the way and so sometimes it's not possible. So you're probably saying to yourself well, what do I do if you know I can't reach a resolution? Well, in moments like that, I would say turn to Romans, chapter 12, verse 18, which says if possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. So you're responsible for your actions and your attitude and not the other person's response. I'm going to say that again You're responsible for your actions and your attitude, not the other person. So in unresolved situations, it's better to set healthy boundaries and entrust the matter to God and let God work it out. In other words, you do what you need to do on your end to seek reconciliation, to seek peace as much as you possibly can. And if the other party does not wish to seek peace, if they just can't bring themselves to do that, that's fine.
Speaker 1:In moments like that, you want to set a boundary, whether that's okay, I'm not going to talk to this person for a while. I'll give them time to cool off and maybe in time we can come back and revisit this. Or if that means you know, if you're living together you may have to move out. If you work together, you may have to find a way to maybe change shifts so that you're not working on the same shift. Whatever boundary you might need to put in place to give that person time to quote unquote cool off and give time for God to work on their heart and work on their mind. To bring them to a point where peace can finally be made between the two of you is also my recommendation that in that period of time, if you haven't already forgive that person, forgive that person. If you truly want reconciliation and peace, the first thing you can do is let that person know that you forgive them, set the boundary, but let them know I forgive you and leave them with that and in that, in that time that you might be apart or that you may not be speaking, you may not see each other, god will be working on that person but on the flip side, you can be at peace, because then you've made every effort possible to bring about peace and now you will have peace in your heart because you forgave that person, you let it go, you put it down, you were the peacemaker.
Speaker 1:So, in closing, I just want to say conflict is inevitable. It is. You can't get away from it. Unfortunately, human beings are not always going to see eye to eye. There's always going to be disagreements. Someone is always going to think that their way is better. Um, someone may, you know, have the impression that they are above you on a level that you could never reach, possibly. Um, someone will always have something to say about how you do things, or how you don't do things, or whether you do things exactly the way that they want you to. Um, there are manipulators, there are masters of guilt. Um, there are people who will shame you and there are people out here who feel that they always have to be right. Unfortunately, it's not something you can escape, no matter what corner of the world you try to run to, but it doesn't have to define our relationships. So, when we approach disagreements with grace and humility, in a heart aligned with God's word, we not only resolve disputes, but we grow closer to him and to each other. I encourage you To reflect on a conflict you're facing right now. What steps can you take today to address it in a way that honors God?
Speaker 1:And remember that seeking peace is not a sign of weakness, and you know that bothers me just a tad bit. People think that peacemakers are weak, that to go out here and want to reconcile and be in harmony with each other is a sign of weakness and it's not. Harmony with each other is a sign of weakness and it's not. It takes a super strong person to be able to stand in the midst of a storm and take everything that's thrown at them and then still seek peace. If you've ever been in a heated argument and if you can remember what it felt like when the other person was just saying so many mean, awful things and they were blaming you for so many things. Did it feel like little cuts and tears to your, to your soul, to your spirit? I know for me that's what it feels like. It's like somebody is just taking a sword and just slashing at me. It hurts, it definitely hurts, but you have to be able to stand and take that beating in order to seek peace. It takes a strong person to withstand an attack and still want to make things right.
Speaker 1:So seeking peace is not a sign of weakness. It's a reflection of strength. It's God's strength within us and for anyone that's navigating a conflict right now, or when you do end up in a conflict at some point, try to hold on to these words from James, chapter three, verse 18. Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness. I want to close with a prayer.
Speaker 1:I want to close with a prayer. Heavenly Father, thank you for teaching us how to handle conflict in ways that reflect your love and truth. Help us to be peacemakers in our homes, workplaces and communities. Give us the courage to approach disagreements with grace, humility and patience. May your spirit guide us as we seek reconciliation and healing in our relationships. In Jesus' name, I pray, amen. I want to thank you for joining me on today's episode of the Godly Night Report. If you found this episode helpful, I'd love to hear from you, share your thoughts on the episode or any stories about navigating conflict with grace. Thoughts on the episode or any stories about navigating conflict with grace. You can do so on our Facebook page, on Instagram, or you can send me an email at thegodlynightreport at gmailcom, and if you'd like to support the show, you can buy me a coffee at buymeacoffeecom. Slash thegodlynightreport and until next time, remember God is always there for you. Even when you're not there for him, he's always there for you. Stay safe, god bless, and I'll see you in the next one.
